Don’t Take the Bait

Kimberly Becker
Sep 19
2 min read

Have you ever walked out of a meeting, closed an email, or ended a conversation and immediately thought: “Why did I respond like that?”

So often, it’s not the situation itself that derails us—it’s the “bait” we take in the moment. Stressors, deadlines, unexpected losses, shifting priorities from leadership, or even changes in the economy can set us up to react in ways that don’t align with who we want to be as leaders.

When the bait is thrown in front of us—whether it’s a sharp comment, a frustrating decision, or an overwhelming demand—we have a choice. But in the moment, it doesn’t always feel that way. Instead, we find ourselves reacting instead of responding, and later, we’re disappointed in how we showed up for ourselves or for our team.

Why It Happens

As leaders, our strengths are also where our blind spots often hide. For example, a strong sense of responsibility can become rigidity under pressure. A drive for results can quickly shift into impatience. The traits that serve us well most of the time can, in times of stress, turn into the very derailers that hold us back.

That’s where awareness comes in.

Awareness Is Key

One of the tools I use with leaders and teams is the Harrison Assessment, which measures 175 behavior traits. It highlights not only your natural strengths, but also the potential derailers that surface when stress or pressure is high.

Here’s the good news: behaviors can be shifted. Once you’re aware of the bait that hooks you most often—whether it’s defensiveness, overcommitting, avoiding conflict, or something else—you can begin to build new strategies. You can pause, reframe, and choose a different response that aligns with the leader you want to be.